Gggrrrrrr!!!! Frustration!

I so dont even really know where to start... I am getting pretty tired of people and their judgements about this sweet little boy! I've had people tell me he needs structure, i've had people tell me he's bad and it's basically my fault. Just so many things that are offensive to me and break my heart! First I have to say that he is anything but bad! He doesn't go around hitting, pushing, calling names, or biting other kids. He doesn't go around picking fights. He actually tries to avoid confrontation. He is still learning manners, but those are hard to teach any kid. To say please and thankyou, is it really so hard? I've really kind of HAD IT with people and their snap judgements.... Alex does have some issues. I'm not going to lie... He has a really hard time sitting still. I guess that makes him a bad kid and me a bad mom! What people dont know is that I've worked my BUTT off with this kid since the day he was born. He cried from the time he woke up in the mornings until the time he went to bed, then waking up in the middle of the night for a couple more hours of crying. When he was a baby. He didnt nap unless I was driving him around in my car. He was this way until I just started putting him in his bed and letting him cry. Some days he'd cry for an hour strait until he fell asleep. Then he hit 11 months and started running (yes running not walking...) I couldn't get him to sit for ANYTHING! I had to strap him to his chair at mealtimes just so he'd sit long enough to eat. I couldn't take him anywhere unless I could hold him or strap him into something or he'd run off and this little boy is a fast runner! I couldn't even let him out of the house without holding his hand because as soon as he got out, he'd take off running. And then the terrible two's came along.... He'd throw two or three massive temper tantrums everyday. He'd would roll around on the floor screaming until my ears bled. He has improved so much! He has just come so far in the short four years he's been here. Like I said, i've worked my butt off with him. I can take him to the store and let him walk and he doesn't take off running. If we're at home he'll sit to eat a meal (going to somebodies house, though is another story... ) He VERY rarely throws a temeper tantrum. The last one was up in UT and the time before that it had been a year. He will sit long enough to watch a movie or to watch cartoons in the mornings.

He has a difficult time focusing, but i'm working on that as well. I haven't had any medical professional opinions about him, but I think he's A.D.D and A.D.H.D. I'm afraid to take him to the dr for this because I refuse to medicate my four year old because he has tons of energy and has a hard time focusing. I think riddalin on a four year old is a cop out. Yes at the end of everyday I'm exhausted because just watching Alex is exhausting! The running and running...I dont see how he's not tired all the time. But, he just needs something to focus that energy on. Right now he's focused on King Tut. Even though I get tired of talking about King Tut all day everyday, we've both learned alot and sometimes it's the only way I can get him to just sit and relax. I could go on and on.... Just leave him alone! He's a good boy! I'm not going to have society let my boy think that he's bad, because he's NOT!